Wednesday, November 14, 2012

Knees to the floor

{a recurring series, a post between friends, inspired by a mini-meditation retreat led by Karen Maezen Miller. we are grateful she showed up.}

We carved out a few brief moments yesterday while the rain came down and tapped on my tin roof.  We sat on our cushions on the soft blue rug, the cat looked on, she disapproved.

I used to think of meditation as a solitary practice, not something a person shares or that is done in groups. I thought it lonely, contemplative, introspective.  What possibly could be the benefit of sitting together?

I'm skilled at running away, hiding, doing things on my own.  It is habit I tell myself, it is introversion and I might be lying, I know just what it is.  But now when faced with this new thing, an unknown leap I'm doing it in tandem, a stretch that contradicts my natural tendency and what I thought I knew.  I wear my ignorance.

Life is better when practicing it together.  I learned that lesson from my kids, my husband, who even on the worst days won't let me run.

And for those of you who might also have trouble reaching out, traveling outside your comfort zone, making friends later in life, here's a little something you might want to read.  In my case, I just have to throw old habits and hangups out the window and be myself even when fear wants to take over.  Maybe that will work for you too.  But then maybe you're cool and don't have any problems.



Clair said...

A deeper, fuller, brighter, rainy day because of Our Sit.

Julie said...

What an awesome quote from C.S. Lewis! In my thirties I often found myself making excuses as to why I didn't have more close friends. (too busy, I like doing things on my own, working too much, homebody, etc.). There is some truth to each of those excuses, but I also found it so much easier to simply meet people than actually get to know them. And when folks (including myself) moved on to a new job, city, stage in life, ect. I often didn't put effort into stay in touch.

I've really been trying to stretch myself out of those old excuses (now that I'm 40 and out of my thirties, you mature) Moving across the country to a place where I knew no one and family was super far away has helped. Having two young children has helped too. Motherhood really connect women of all types, and I'm much more open to friending all sorts of women than I was previously. I'm lucky too, to have met some great people out here in Reno.

One of the many marvelous benefits of motherhood is that so much ego is just stripped away. It's so lovely to be without that burden weighing me down.

Thanks for sharing. I miss the rain!


amy said...

Julie--I could also relate to the part of the article that talked about having friends from different parts of life--mom friends, old friends, baseball friends, gymnastics friends, book club friends, knitting friends, etc.