Tuesday, August 14, 2012

In the sand


While the others busied themselves in the waves, this one brought me endless offerings from the sea.  This little girl somehow ended up my critter catcher.  It is in odd contrast to her love for accessories.


The dance was the same all week.  Walk to ocean, dig under surf, scoop up handfuls of living creatures, bring them to mom for show-and-tell.  Listen to mom "ooh" and "ahh" and remark at the size of each one as if the differences between them are vast.  Take creature back to the ocean and watch it wriggle backward under the sand. 

Yes, I wish we were still there.  Yes, I wish I hadn't already had the post-vacation meltdown that ensues with the realization of a packed work schedule and school (and middle school) about to start and rooms messier than ever and dog smelling like skunk and (damn) rooster still crowing and garden grown over and flowers dying and unsuccessful baseball tryouts and generally wondering if you are doing everything possible to be the best parent you can be even though your littlest still has sore toes from the pool and wondering where in the world you are headed and hoping it's the right direction because you're taking your family with you.

My husband says I have pre-school jitters.  He says I get like this every year.  He says it will pass and every other mom probably feels the same way.

Some drink, some shop, some gab endlessly on the phone, some may clean the house till they're silly to cope.  Part of me wishes I still had my toes in the sand with the fiddler crabs, but of course that cannot be.

2 comments:

beth lehman said...

oh, amy, i hear you here. i stress so much, i just have to have a clean-ish house and some organized meal planning and lunch packing... b/c those are some things i can control. i really have a hard time with the school year starting. i do every year and i'm filled with angst... should my kids be in public school.... but we ease in and everything is fine in a few weeks. i have a first time middle schooler, too, she just got on the bus this morning...at 6:50!! all the best... hold the quiet of the beach in your heart while you face the crazy...

Suzanne said...

Amy, I was just telling my boys today how sorry I was for being grumpy but I just could not put my finger on the problem and then I realized.... I am not ready to give them up - to school, friends,the outside world as we have had this wonderful family time for most of the summer. I also realized I am putting my baby out in the world as well so yes, let's just give it a bit of time and it will all even out. And then plan your vacation for next summer - something to look foward to......and I love talking to you on the phone (thx for the call!) Suz