Pairings

listening to this
and of course this
and this one too

Nick Drake and the beach...they go together

....and a few more...

leaving solitary footprints in the sand


wondering why looking for shells never gets old

trying to imagine who might live way out there

taking the boat from Kitty Hawk to Manteo
watching the dolphins 20 feet off the bow
blow out, breathe in, and swim under the boat

looking at the million dollar boats
and the yellow labs jumping off the dock

collapsing in the sand
just because you can
yep
it was pretty much just like that

Summer favorite

getting away
finding a little piece of heaven
sitting and dreaming
digging, playing, watching it all
spending time
together
nothing better

Catching the light

I feel the light changing already, on my morning walks, in the evening as the sun sets earlier and earlier. I want to tell summer to stay, that I haven't had enough yet, that if it could, I'd like it to stick around all year. But that is a child's dream, and one that somehow I still entertain, as if dreaming young keeps me so, and staves off all things crochety and old.

At the beginning of summer the sun rises on one side of the barn, by mid-summer it comes up directly behind it, and by this time of the year I see it come up all the way on the opposite side of the barn and even further beyond. I know by it's progression where we are, and no matter how I long for the days to stay warm, I know they won't. I'm reminded that with change comes nostalgia, gratitude, humility. That I control practically nothing, and am here to witness, to participate, encourage, love and add rather than detract from a world that sometimes makes no sense.

playing on my ipod and this one

What it feels like

I'm sitting on his bed, waiting for him to fall asleep. Waiting out the fever. Wishing he was up, running around, but instead he's missing the baseball camp he's waited for all summer.

I never knew before having kids how bad I would feel, when they feel bad. Or how good I'd feel when they round 3rd heading for home.

If I could only bottle up the pang inside and let him drink it, the one that wants so badly for him to feel good, I don't think he'd ever be sick again. If only.

Working

Believe it or not I've been making myself a sweater. If you've followed for any length of time you know that my track record is horrible in this regard. Most times (okay every time) I sit down and start making myself a sweater it morphs into something else. Or many somethings else. But this one looks to be a keeper. I have no other plans for the yarn and if truth be told, that's probably the only thing that will save this sweater's life.

I was worried for a moment when I got to the point I am now, thinking it wouldn't fit, but luckily knitting from the top down affords me the chance to try it on during construction. It's perfect. It's perfectly, perfect. Color, fit, size, where the shoulders hit me, everything. Now if I can just find the time to finish it we'll be getting somewhere. And then maybe I'll figure out just what it is that's been holding me back for so long.

Crazy or lazy?

I get up and am out the door early in the summer. Very early. Maybe too early. But it's really the only logical time to go running and walk the dogs when the temperature rises to the upper 90's and low 100's day after day and the humidity feels like a hot, wet, sock wrapped around my lungs.

It seems there is a divide between the early risers and those who'd like to sleep till noon. One half thinks the other is crazy and the other half might think the first are....well, you know. I believe neither to be true. We are who we are and we like what we like for different reasons. Simple as that. The late risers may find their magic in dreams and late nights while the early ones find theirs in the quiet stillness of first daybreak, before the rest of the world wakes up. Somehow I've managed to be an early riser and a late stayer-upper. Maybe that's crazy.

Whatever side of the fence you're on, whatever judgement you may cast on the other group (or not), whether you like steak or tofu, it really doesn't matter. All I know is there is a very brief time in the morning when the sun glows red and the birds are more noticeable than ever that I find a little magic. That dream-like, almost awake, hazy state of mind that when confronted with a sunrise over a country barn makes me glad I didn't miss it.